i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
