We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
