Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
