Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
