This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
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