Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
