If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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