party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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