So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I just found puke in my bra..
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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