You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
