Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
