is your mom at the bar?
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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