That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
