I hope mine doesn't look like that
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize