I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
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