The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize