note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
