So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize