Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
All the doctor said was why
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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