My friends, they love my intelligence
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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