You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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