No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
