I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
40s are totally the cure
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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