I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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