I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I have aggressive nipples.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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