WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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