Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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