Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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