honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
