walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
