Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
