hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
