evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
