Dual....:-)
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
