i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
