My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
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