Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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