He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
