Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize