i already hear my dad disowning me
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
