We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Randomize
