so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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