Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
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