So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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