I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
