do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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