i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize