he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
