I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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