She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
