Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
only if we run a train.
done.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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